You’re beginning to pickup speed, as you head down the hump.
It’s a good time to start thinking about your weekend. It’s also a good time to ponder about life, love, and why…
- I used to eat a lot of natural foods, until I learned that most people die of natural causes.
- There are two kinds of pedestrians… The quick and the dead.
- Life is sexually transmitted.
- The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.
- Health people are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.
- Have you noticed that ever since everyone owns a cell phone these days, no one talks about seeing UFOs like they used to?
- Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again.
- All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.
- In the 60’s, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and we take Prozac to make it normal.
- How is it that one careless match can start a forest fire. However, it takes a whole box to start a campfire?
- Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, ‘I think I’ll squeeze these dangly things and drink whatever comes out’? Hmmm, how about eggs?
- If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?
- If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?
- Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?
- Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?